"We even name her baby and ask God to let him live and to let her see the truth because we know abortion not only kills the baby, but deeply wounds the mother’s soul."

I am a Regnum Christi member and a client advocate at The Pregnancy Counseling Center located in Mission Hills, California. I work at the center once a week while my children are in school. I was inspired to write about this experience to help deter those who are considering abortion and inspire others to pray and help the pro-life movement.  For more information on our center, go to http://www.pregnanthelp4u.org/.  To see one of my past testimonies, click here.

I could tell this was going to be a hard case.  The client is a pregnant single mother of a 2-year-old with no family support.  She is working full time and involved in a relationship with a boyfriend who is convinced the baby is not his, since he had a vasectomy a few years before.
She is definitely not in a good position to parent another child at this time.

Initially, she assured my co-worker and me that she does not “believe in abortion.”  She already had a baby when things were just as hard.

“But.” she continues, “I cannot go through it again.”

The Black Sheep

She truly has experienced great hardship: her family did not help her at all and

	Logo of the Pregnancy Counseling Center located in Mission Hills, California

has had no contact with her or their grandson. She is considered the ‘black sheep’ of the family, and having another out-of-wedlock baby would only confirm their perception.

My co-worker and I acknowledge the hardship in her having and keeping this baby.  After looking at all her options, we ask her to watch a video of women who selflessly and lovingly have given their babies up for adoption.  She agrees to watch it, but at the end says that she cannot choose to do that.  If she carries the baby, she cannot possibly give it up, she says. This sentiment is common with our clients because they perceive abortion is the lesser of two evils.

We notice she has a religious affiliation and we pursue this strength. She says she believes that abortion is morally wrong, but she does not want to think beyond that. She is afraid she will change her mind.  We show her the possible impacts abortion will have in her life: physical, emotional and psychological. She agrees it is a woman’s natural tendency to nurture her child and not hurt it. 

Throughout the session, we send prayers to Heaven asking for the “right words,” the appropriate resources to give her for her particular situation, the right intervention so she will choose life. We spend a long time making sure she is aware of every aspect and impact of her choice.  We even show her the baby with the help of an ultrasound machine. Tears flow down her face as she looks at the baby on the screen.

We have no more to offer. We wait in hope, and we silently pray.

He Knocks at the Door

Though we know that, as client advocates, we need to be open to God’s intervention, our clients also need to be open to God’s grace.  He respects our free will and does not impose Himself on us.  We know this client has put up a “wall,” yet we also know behind this wall, she does not want to abort her baby. Will she let God in? 

Her wall is too strong, and her choice is not life.

We regretfully accept her decision, and offer her help if she needs it after the abortion. We make sure she knows that no matter what she chooses to do, we will be there for her.  We say good bye, still hoping she has a change of heart in the days to come.

We follow-up a few days later, and she seems grateful for our concern. She says her boyfriend wants her to have the abortion because later, they will do it the “right way.”  They will get married.  He will have the vasectomy “reversed” and then they can have children.  She is determined to go ahead with the abortion the following Friday at a facility in Beverly Hills.  She will pay extra to be fully asleep and unaware of what is happening.

We go home and pray daily for her and her baby. We even name her baby and ask God to let him live and to let her see the truth because we know abortion not only kills the baby, but deeply wounds the mother’s soul.

Friday comes, and she has the abortion. We all mourn, for the baby and the mother.

Broken in Need of Healing

Two weeks later she walks in our clinic again.  She is sobbing and in great distress.  Her boyfriend has left her, and she is deeply sorry for the abortion... 

She is broken, and we try to pick up the pieces.  We counsel her and provide her with the appropriate referrals.   She is Catholic and agrees to see a priest the following day.  Her journey towards healing begins. 

We know we cannot do this work without God for He is our strength, our hope, the source of our love for these women and their babies. His love is what drives us to want to help.  We must be patient and hold strong. We must be ready for the next battle and look forward to the day when we win the war.

For your information, below are links to some of our referral resources:
Project Rachel   www.hopeafterabortion.com
Rachel’s Vineyard   www.rachelsvineyard.org 
Partial List of Pro-Life Pregnancy Centers www.covenantnews.com/pregnant