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| Fr. Paul Lara LC | |
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*Translation of the Spanish original text
God calls each
soul at the proper time. He calls some when they
are children, others after their studies in college. He called
me when I was a little older, since I had
already finished university and was working. God had been calling
me in different ways, but I was slow to realize
it.
I had had a good friendship with God all
my life; I had some kind of a prayer life,
sometimes closer, other times perhaps a bit more distant, but
on the whole it was a life of presence and
closeness to God. When I graduated from college, I had
fallen into a routine of work and my various pastimes;
as far as money was concerned, I had all I
needed to be able to satisfy all the whims that
can occur to a 26 year old: I had the
best clothes, the latest model of car, a boat, motorcycles,
and all the toys that I could want. Let’s say
that it was a life of “materialism” lived to the
hilt. I had my hobbies, but nevertheless, there was something
missing in my life, something that I couldn’t fill with
any of my whims.
My mother had been in the Regnum
Christi Movement for years, and various Legionaries of Christ came
to our house on a regular basis to visit us.
Those were wonderful visits, because we really did enjoy their
presence and we admired them very much, but the admiration
didn’t go any further than that; it never occurred to
me to be like them. It simply was not the
moment for me; in fact, I had no interest in
attending the retreats and talks they organized.
A Seed
Is Planted
Finally, one day I went to a retreat
preached by a Legionary of Christ, and my spiritual life
underwent a drastic change. The Holy Spirit was working hard,
and in that retreat, I perceived that my prayer life
was very weak and that I had to do something
to improve it. I saw that in my life, God
was giving me everything, and on my part, I wasn’t
responding. I realized that I should change my life, especially
my relationship with God in prayer.
From that day on,
I started to pray the rosary every day, went to
Mass two or three times a week, had adoration in
front of the Blessed Sacrament once a week, and came
to confession more frequently. I started to attend Regnum Christi
activities and dedicated myself fully to the apostolate, but I
didn’t want to commit myself too much because of a
fear of commitment. I didn’t want to say “yes” and
then afterwards not follow through.
Finally, after two years, I went
to the first Regnum Christi Youth and Family Encounter in
Chicago. There, I was told that I should be a soldier
for Christ. In that moment, I didn’t think at all
about becoming a Legionary; rather, I interpreted it as a
call to be a good soldier for Christ in Regnum
Christi.
One year later, I went full of enthusiasm to the
Youth and Family Encounter in St. Louis, Missouri, without the
least suspicion that my life was going to undergo a
drastic change. It was a powerful experience, because along with
two Legionaries, we brought 42 boys from Texas in a
bus, and we had the opportunity to see them in
action. The Legionary priests impressed me by their way of
working, their manner of dealing with others, and their dedication
to prayer.
The Watershed Moment
On the last day of
the convention, I heard a talk about Christ’s great love
for us, and that gave the story of Blessed José
Sánchez del Río, a boy who was martyred at the
age of 12 in the religious persecution in Mexico, known
as the “Cristero War”. Never in my life had I
paid such close attention during a talk. It was very clear
that God had an enormous, personal love for me, that
he had given everything, and that he wanted me to
respond by giving him my whole life. I had two
options: to live a lie by telling him that I
wanted it, but then doing what I wanted; or, in
the second place, I could love him with my works
by surrendering myself completely to his will.
In that moment, I
realized that God was calling me and that I had
to respond to him by giving myself completely to him.
I made the decision to stop seeking myself and to
stop running away, to follow him wherever he wanted to
lead me. When I made this decision, I felt a
great peace and happiness, and at the same time, a
certain fear, because I didn’t know exactly what giving this
step would imply. Then came some days of doubt, but
thanks to God, it was still clear to me that
God was calling me, that I had to answer with
a “yes,” and that I had it in me to
be generous.
Something very important in this vocational path was the
support of our Blessed Mother, and the devotion to her
that I learned on my first visit to a Legionary
community. It helped me so much to see the love
that the priests and brothers had for the Blessed Virgin,
which they showed in their prayers to her, especially in
the moment when they stopped in front of her image
to visit her and to pray for some intention.
Accepting
God’s Plan
After the talk at the St. Louis Encounter,
I spoke with Father Dominic Pham, LC and with Father
Emilio Díaz Torre, LC, who invited me to the candidacy
program (the summer course to see if God was calling
me to the priestly or consecrated life) in Cheshire, which
had already started and would end in less than a
month. I would have to make the decision right away
or wait another year before entering the congregation. My family
still didn’t know anything about my vocational restlessness; I still
had a job and various responsibilities, but I knew that
God was asking me to give it all to him
in that moment without any more delays. I spoke with
my parents, letting them know about my desires to do
God’s will. I left my work and the other responsibilities,
and two weeks later I went to Cheshire. Ten years
have gone by, and it feels like only five.
I never
thought I could be a priest of Christ, one of
his Legionaries, until I realized that God was calling me.
I didn’t think I had the qualities or the vocation,
but when God called, I couldn’t just say “No”. I
had to give him at least the opportunity of showing
me his divine plans. From the day I said “yes”,
he has taken care of all the rest. At first,
I thought I was the generous one, but I soon
realized that I was the one receiving God’s greatest gift.
Father
Paul Lara, LC was born in Mexico City on August
7, 1971, and his family later moved to San Antonio,
Texas. He entered the Legion in 1997 and worked as
an instructor of formation in Oaklawn Academy, Wisconsin and as
a formator in the Center for Higher Studies of the
Legion of Christ in Thornwood, New York. He was a
member of the auxiliary formation team in the Pontifical College
Maria Mater Ecclesiae in Rome. He has a license in
International Business from St. Mary´s University in San Antonio, Texas,
and completed his philosophy and theology studies in Rome at
the Pontifical Athenaeum Regina Apostolorum. On May 19, 2007, José
Gómez, archbishop of San Antonio, Texas ordained him to the
diaconate along with his father, Mr. Rafael Lara, a Regnum
Christi member who is now a permanent deacon for that
diocese. Father Paul is currently carrying out his apostolate in
Aguascalientes, Mexico.
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