Staying together through the rough times is the biggest service you can do for your kids and for yourselves, said Fr. Daniel.

Oxford, Michigan – “Love is like driving a car”… “You’re on a winning team”… “Sometimes you need to put gasoline on the fire.”

Using these analogies and more, including the great analogy of Christ’s love for his Church in Ephesians 5, Fr. Daniel Weber LC helped the 17 married couples who attended his March 3, 2012 mini-retreat to get a better understanding of the ongoing beauty and challenges presented in married life. 

The event, including a Marriage Renewal service, took place at the Queen of the Family Retreat Center in Oxford, Michigan.

Christ on Your Team

Fr. Daniel began his presentation with one of his favorite topics - sports. He said marriage is “like playing football.  You can always improve.”

“I am like a cheerleader on the sidelines. I’m saying ‘Rah, Rah! You can do it! You are on a winning team!’”

He suggested the couples remember the good times in their marriages.  Asking his listeners to remember the original reasons they married each other, he said, “How many years has it been since you said ‘I do’? Since then, how many ‘games’ have you seen?  How many ‘opponents’ have you faced? I want to thank you for staying together through the rough times.  It is the biggest service you can do for your kids and for yourselves.

“There will be ups and downs,” he said. “You may have already seen it, been through a lot.”

Then he reminded the couples who is the most important member of their family “team.”

“Sometimes we think we can do it ourselves,” he said. “But you are not alone in this.  You have Christ.  He is very involved in your life, it’s true.  He is not a distant God. 

“Look for

	Married couples attended the mini-retreat with Fr. Daniel Weber LC in Oxford, Michigan

Christ, trust in Him, the creator of Heaven and Earth. Bring Christ into the picture.” 

Fr. Daniel said it is easy to forget “how good God is.”

“He put down his life for you,” he said. “What more proof do you need?”

Husbands, Love Your Wives…

He reminded the couples in attendance of the Scripture passages from Ephesians 5 comparing marriage to the love of Christ for his Church.

“Paul could have used another analogy from another parable…the vines in the vineyard or planting seeds,” he said, but the fact that St. Paul selected the marriage analogy illustrates the importance of the marriage sacrament.

Quoting the passage Eph. 5: 25, he told the men, “Husbands, love your wives.” He challenged them love their wives “through Christ.”

“I know there is a lot expected from you, and I know it is hard. You have a lot of things to do.  But you have to do it,” he said.

“Christ gave his life for the Church. Husbands are to lay down their lives for their wives. How can a husband lay down his life? He must be a leader.  Husbands are called to be leaders.  Leaders live by priority, and your wife is your priority.”

He told the husbands to “renew” their love for their wives every day.  “Make it part of your routine. If your faith is important to you, you should love your wife even more.” 

He acknowledged that, though communication is very important in a marriage, women often have an easier time with this than men. He suggested that husbands “don’t go on standby” when their wives speak to them.  “This is where guys put down their lives,” he said.

Be Subject to Your Husbands

To the wives, he quoted Ephesians 5, verse 22.

“Be subject to your husband as you are to the Lord.”

He reminded the wives that, “Your husband just pledged his life for you. You have a partner for life, someone to lean on.”

Fr. Daniel told a story about a woman he knows who has a simple way of renewing her love for her husband. 

“She says she has a list of his best characteristics, and every time he does something she dislikes, she reminds herself that ‘He is my fortune,’” he said.

Love is like Driving a Car

Fr. Daniel then moved from Sacred Scripture to an auto maintenance analogy, saying that, “Love is sometimes like driving a car.  We need to keep up the maintenance – add fluids, replace the brakes, change the oil and put on new tires.”

“This is in our hands,” he said. “We can do these things.  This is not rocket science.”

Fr. Daniel told his listeners that he hoped he had helped them to “put some gasoline on the fire” of their marriages.

“I can tell you where it (the gasoline) is, but you have to put it on,” he said.

He admitted to his audience that loving each other as Christ loves the Church, through total “self-giving” is difficult.  To make things a bit easier from the start, he suggested his listeners consider giving about “10 to 15 percent more.  Start there.”