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| The Hawbaker Family takes to the streets. | |
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By: Elizabeth Hawbaker
It sounded like a good idea
from the beginning: exciting, new, a little out of my
comfort zone, but something worth finding out about: missions as
a family. Stan, my husband, said yes with no hesitation.
So we entered the mission not knowing a whole lot
of details but the Holy Spirit gave us peace and
zeal. Our plans for traveling down a day early to
go to Galveston worked out perfectly and God provided us
with a much needed vacation and the chance for Luke,
6 years old, and Sarah, 2 years old, to see
the beach for the first time.
The mission itself was
not without struggle. We were physically tired from the long
days, emotionally drained from traveling with children, and on Saturday,
Sarah got a stomach virus. But it was all worth
it. We managed to work things out so that Stan
and Luke were able to go the mission on Saturday
while Sarah and I stayed at our host family’s house.
By Easter morning, she was fine and we were all
together again.
On the surface, the mission seems like an
excellent response to the call from John Paul II to
go and preach the Gospel in the streets and from
the rooftops. We know we have the tremendous gift of
faith that is worth infinitely more than anything else we
have to offer anyone. So why not go door-to-door?
As
we arrived to the mission, found out more details, and
began our work, it occurred to me that the more
we experienced the mission, the better we enjoyed it. Several
factors made this Holy Week an incredible tool for bringing
others to Christ, including my own family.
An Enthusiastic Community
One
afternoon as we were all about to start our second
day of door-to-door missions, I walked back inside to grab
a water bottle. As I passed all the moms and
dads and little children I thought, “These people look like
ordinary families doing the ordinary family business of getting snacks,
changing diapers, moms chatting, dads carrying diaper bags and pushing
strollers.” But, as I walked through the room, I realized
that behind the ordinary appearances was something extraordinary. All of
these people, whom I could pass by any day along
the aisles of the grocery store or at the neighborhood
park, were willing to go out and forget about themselves
for three days, knock on strangers’ doors, and pray in
the middle of their driveways with them. It was a
surreal experience!
A Contagious Solidarity
God made us capable of
feeling a strong sense of empathy in our experiences with
other people. Have you ever watched a sad movie and
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| Door to door missions work is a tough job. | |
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really felt like you had just grieved, or watched a
football game and felt the same adrenaline rush as if
you had scored the touchdown, or watched someone walk down
the sidewalk carrying something heavy and you “felt” for them?.
God “hardwired” us to be able to feel and learn
from each other’s experience, so that little children could watch
their parents and learn good things, and so that we
could connect emotionally with each other. As parents, we try
to surround our kids with other kids who do good
things so that their good example has a positive effect
on our own kids. I was thinking about this one
afternoon as my son and two other children ran (not
walked) to door after door after door. They were not
just goofy kids running around. They were genuinely excited when
we walked up to a door and saw a cross
above the door bell. And thanks to that God-given capacity
for empathy and solidarity, we could feel each other’s excitement.
Their boldness was literally contagious.
One time, we saw that
someone had the scripture from Joshua “As for me and
my house, we will serve the Lord,” posted on their
house. Seeing it, Luke exclaimed, “They already believe in Jesus!
That’s awesome!” As if he was thinking, well our work
is half done here! Then, at another home where the
woman invited us in, Luke looked up at me with
gleaming, hopeful eyes and asked, “Is she Catholic? Does she
go to St. James?” When I told him that she
did go to St. James, he shouted, “Yes!” I could
just see how happy he was! And we were surrounded
by kids and teens having the same reaction.
I can’t
imagine a better way to help my kids possess their
faith as they grow and be able to cling to
Christ when they are faced with so many other “gods”
to serve as they become adults. When we were on
the mission, my kids were young, so their evangelization was
in simple, sweet ways…the smiles on their faces, the careful
yet backwards sign of the cross before we began to
pray, the eagerness to hand someone a flyer with Mass
and confession times on it, the scanning of the front
door to see if there was a cross or a
statue or Scripture verse anywhere, the little voices praying the
Our Father in doorways and on sidewalks, in driveways and
in the middle of the street. But, as they mature,
so will the faith that they are able to share.
They will grow in boldness with strangers so that they
will also be able to be bold with their friends
at home. They will stand next to other teens as
they knock on doors and proclaim their love for Christ
and they will remember that they were not alone in
their efforts to be bold.
Catch Them Early
We walked door-to-door with
several families, some with little ones in strollers, some with
teens and some in between. I could pick out the
teens who had been on missions before (some of them
with groups going door-to-door for over a month in other
countries over the summer without their parents) and see the
difference between them and the teens who had never been
on a mission before. The more experienced teens spoke to
the strangers before the parents even had a chance. They
prayed out loud spontaneously for the needs of the strangers
and spoke in Spanish right away when they realized someone
didn’t speak English well. But the ones who were less
experienced had the typical teenage self-consciousness deeply embedded, and seemed
much more comfortable standing at the end of the driveway
or hanging back from the group. So what a blessing
it was for the young kids to learn to be
bold and fearless missionaries, and to forget themselves before they
ever learned that they were doing something unusual!
Warning: Leave SELF
on Sidewalk
I think we have all been in a situation
where we realized that someone was going to think, “This
person is a religious fanatic!” But, you can probably guess
that this thought is going to run through plenty of
people’s minds as they open the door to 3 adults
and 6 children wearing the same t-shirts and crosses with
pamphlets with Jesus on the front, asking them if they
have any prayer intentions—and “By the way can we just
pray with you right here?” So, you have to get
accustomed to just leave yourself behind and truly put on
Christ. I am a pretty bold person when it comes
to proclaiming my faith (my Protestant extended family has given
me plenty of opportunities to practice!) but I had to
consciously tell myself, “I have the incredible gift of Jesus
in the Eucharist, the gift of the priests to hear
my confessions, the enormity of the truth, so how can
I not go out and tell others?” And there were
still times we would be talking to someone and they
would respond vaguely to one our questions and I would
freeze up. I wouldn’t be able to think of something
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| Stan, Elizabeth, Luke and Sarah: ready to preach the Good News. | |
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good to say to them. I think in those moments
I must have started thinking of myself and I wasn’t
able to hear the Holy Spirit’s whisperings. Just as a
high wire acrobat is told, “Don’t look down!”, I think
at times I must have “looked down” and was suddenly
rendered unable to think. That left me with the opportunity
to rely on Jesus to make up for what I
lacked, to fill in those empty silences, to work on
that person’s heart long after they had shut the door
on me.
We had time in between doors or later
in the evenings, so I was able to reflect on
the different people we had encountered. In hindsight, I realized
so many things I could have said, so many things
that might have helped the person. One man in particular
opened the door and we could see his body covered
in tattoos. His shirt said in big letters “TATTOO ARTIST”,
and he wore a chain with a cross. My group
kind of clammed up and Stan and I started talking
to him. I asked him if he were Catholic and
he said no, but that he wore the cross because
he believed. He said he had messed up a lot
and that he had been in prison several times and
he didn’t go to any church in particular. Stan has
had some experience with tattoo artists at his workplace so
he complimented him on his work and asked him about
some of the tattoos. He didn’t want to pray with
us because he said he wouldn’t know how (this was
a response we heard a lot, especially from men) so
he started to go back in and we said goodbye.
As we got down the driveway he came back out
and wanted to talk some more. Just chit chat, nothing
really big. But it was obvious he didn’t want us
to leave. He got really excited when he remembered some
doves had laid two eggs in his tree, so we
lifted our kids up to see the low nest. He
wanted to share something with us and he didn’t want
us to leave until he had given something back. As
we began to talk with him a little more and
the subject moved back to Christ, his telephone rang and
he ran inside to get it, saying it was an
important call. Saved by the bell! I secretly hoped the
phone call was someone inviting him to church or something.
Looking back, I wish I would have told him, “Our
faith is one of starting over— every day if you
have to. That’s the beauty of the spiritual life and
our Catholic faith with confession. We come into the light
and see where we messed up and then we’re born
again in Christ to do it over. We can learn
from our mistakes, grow in virtue...” I wanted to tell
him how the prison system or society or maybe even
his family might not be willing to give him that
second, third, or fourth chance, but Christ is willing to.
I wanted to tell him that he could go to
St. James around the corner and talk to Father Charles
about “starting over”, about the real meaning of the cross
around his neck, about his life. But those words were
just thoughts that got offered up at Mass for him
in the hope that somehow he will come to realize
them.
“I Am a Missionary”
There is no better way to spend
Holy Week than by going on missions, and there is
no better way to convince myself that I am in
fact a missionary with a very distinct mission to bring
Christ to this world. By the end of the week,
I think we all realized that going door-to-door is nothing
compared with being charitable in the long dinner lines with
rambunctious children spilling lemonade in the corner, with the noise
level growing each moment, with tired, hungry children looking across
the room for me and soon to wander off… and
with me knowing that if I leave my place in
line we’ll never get to eat and we’ll be in
this vicious cycle until midnight. So little by little, or
should I say door by door, my “mission” became more
and more concrete in my heart. Sure, I knew it
before we went but somehow it is deeper, more real
now. And, now I can look at Luke and say,
“This is not how a missionary family behaves. We cannot
talk to each other this way. You can’t keep pestering
your sister this way. We have to encourage each other
in virtue because we are missionaries.”
Proclaim the Gospel, But Use
Words Only When Necessary
Of course there were many doors that
remained closed to us. But we still have the hope
that those who might have been inside looking out saw
our crosses and watched us walk away from their door
with our t-shirts proclaiming “Be Not Afraid!”. This was the
second time this particular neighborhood had Catholic missionaries going out
during Holy Week. So, maybe not this year or even
next year… but maybe on the 8th year they will
remember our presence and have the courage to open their
door. Or, for those people who immediately dismissed us because
we are “Catholic Missionaries” and they personally belong to some
Protestant denomination, maybe just seeing us out there with our
children planted a seed in their hearts. Many homes in
this neighborhood were devoid of children. Some older people seemed
very lonely. Maybe just seeing those smiling (or sometimes sleeping)
faces from the strollers helped them get through the loneliness
of the day. Or maybe it caused some to stop
and think about what it took for a family to
be going door to door in the middle of the
afternoon on a Thursday or Friday….the men obviously had to
take off work, the kids were cranky sometimes, and our
motley crew standing at the door had to proclaim the
message of life in some way to the people on
the other side of the door.
Those are the things
we may never know, but that’s almost the best part
of this great adventure: knowing and hoping to see God’s
awesome work, knowing that someday we will be able to
know how he wove all these families and experiences and
sacrifices into the salvation of the world.